horsemouth the retiree (true tales of american life)

so horsemouth retired

there was no realisation that it was time and that he was ready to go 

there was no sudden life changing event.  

horsemouth supposes that covid killed his job. it prevented the main business of his employer from going on and, at the same time. it revealed that the unit was not profitable (the workload was always pretty variable). 

and bingo his job was toast.  strangely the middle management who redundo-ed him and his co-workers did not self-liquidate in this process also. 

initially he retired because he could afford to do so at that moment. there was a redundancy process. then a works pension process (and a cash sum process) but because horsemouth was only enrolled at the last possible moment into his works pension (and because he never earned very much money in his years of work), these sums were not great. 

had the work continued he would have continued working. instead horsemouth was faced with the option of working self-employed (and getting paid less for doing it) or jacking it all in.

he chose to jack it all in. 

however, because he was having fun with the communal endeavour he did not end up moving to the sun or somewhere cheaper than the wen or such like but just continued on with his lackadaisical life.

only later was there a major change in horsemouth's life

and then his father got ill and died and it became clear that his life was going to be out in the wilds. 

quite what horsemouth is supposed to make of all of this he does not know (as usual none of it was planned). 

true tales of american life

a friend remarked;

'I used to hear paul harvey on the radio when I lived in the states in the 90s. he was a peevish blowhard unlike the great studs turkel who came across as a generous and decent guy documenting american life without any judgement...'

horsemouth replied that he'd never heard of paul harvey until horsemouth researched the quote (see previous posting). by way of similarity all he was able to offer up was paul auster's true tales of american life.  

his friend recommended studs turkel's book working. 

horsemouth thinks the truth of things resides in their particularity, in the small scale everyday actions of people. further to this he has pulled steven roger fischer's a history of reading out of the stacks to go with alberto manguel's a history of reading. 

he's just been reading about architect gregory ain and his park planned homes in altadena (and the effect of last year's LA fire on them). 

the good news is that some of them survived.

the bad news is that some of them were destroyed.

of course horsemouth went off down the modernism in LA rabbit hole. books, podcasts, exhibits and all. 

it's good to see people with strong ideas about community and to see it coming to fruition (if not full fruition). 

'a six-inch layer of topsoil and the fact that it rains...'

'despite all our accomplishments, we owe our existence to a six-inch layer of topsoil and the fact that it rains.'

this  'old adage' (repeated in when the flames went out, LA review of books, anthony dinh tran, 25th january 2026)  is, in fact, by the (somewhat complicated) US broadcaster paul harvey (he's kind of the anti-studs terkel, studs terkel told everyday tales but he was a leftist, harvey, on the other hand, told tales of everyday life but was a right-winger and a friend of j. edgar hoover).

this probably explains the author's reticence in naming him.. 

horsemouth is enjoying tran's story 

the burnt orange trees must be cut down, six inches of contaminated topsoil must be removed (lead contamination), the costs of rebuilding mount up, and does tran really want to be there anyway? 

he can get the house designed (he works in an architecture adjacent field), he can email his mum for feng shui advice, but can he get it built, can he get the insurance paid (and the federal grants). 

it has its jg ballard moments of suburbia destroyed, possessions lost, ruins left. 

it is one of a series of articles one year on from the fires. but there are other articles on LA fires and rebuilding.

right now (as horsemouth types this) it is raining in the wilds. in fact it is dropping little 1mm sided cubes of ice (but these soon melt). the chickens have been out on patrol on the hill, at their height there were six, now it's down to a foolhardy two, now they are all driven back under cover. 

horsemouth's itchy feet want him to walk but he doesn't want to generate a stampede to the gate by hungry chickens thinking he is bringing food, he will have to sneak round the other side of the house. 

in the end he went over there to get wood for the fire so that set them off. 

later he went over to feed them and lock them up for the night (and collect any eggs laid). 

the weather is looking properly shit out here for the next two weeks. it's a grey misty morning with everything outside thoroughly sodden. today egg deliveries and the bin must be wombled down the drive. soon horsemouth must dig the compost into the garden and get on with growing this years crops.

and flowers. he should probably start growing flowers. 

oh dear a name has cropped up from the past. horsemouth can't say he's best pleased. it crops up now and then. it's a reminder to him that however distant it all feels there are still connections. 

dreadful accidents (and strange adventures)

'the woods are to be felled to pay for de winton's gambling debts...' - kilvert, diaries, 3rd february 1872. 

it's like something out of a russian novel or play.

kilvert is much concerned with dreadful accidents and strange adventures. the blue rocks at blaen cwm, the mawnpools between painscastle and aber edw. rider and horse perishes or the horse comes home alone and the rider does not. the rider is found drowned in the mawnpool with scrabbling marks all round the side like a drowning rat. 

and then the cwmgwanon woods felled for gambling debts (so the gossip goes). the de winton family seem to have been active in the church, banking, porcelain collecting and steam engines. 

yesterday a misty and grey morning. horsemouth was not sure what he would get up to. 

he went for a walk. down to the abbey. across the field to the dore river. along the fence of the military base. back across the road to follow the dore up a little way in the direction of the alms houses and then back to the village hall and round. on his way he bumped into the bus driver (whose guitar practice is going well). 

he had a partial plan to maybe take the bus into town but in the end he decided it was kind of pointless - his second hand book options are much better in the wen. 

'I could have gone on after summer 1980. just doing that. keeping a journal of time and the sea...'

- marguerite duras, practicalities. 

'the people who pay to hear you sing or speak are enemies you have to get the better of in order to survive.' - random sentence from practicalities by marguerite duras.

this is probably the least facebook, bandcamp, substack, patreon sentence it is possible to have. 

duras wins again. what is the origin of this? it is in her mother's fear of officialdom (a typical attitude of the poor duras says). duras's way up and out is through oral examinations a way with words as the title of the chapter puts it (in an adornoish echo, its english translation). 

'... when you have done it once, after you've once mastered the words and carried the audience with you, it happens to you all the time.' 

horsemouth supposes that the purpose of substack  is that you write endless essays as if in a try-out for a real writing job (one that is published, if not paid for).  

in differentiation the posts in blogger tend to be slightly less fully formed. horsemouth supposes it is analogous to the soundcloud/ bandcamp distinction. 

practicalities is coming the other way. from a known existing writer towards the quotidian everyday world. it was first published in french in 1987 but there had been the earlier semi-autobiographical writings from her. 

random sentence - 'for fifteen years I threw away my manuscripts as soon as the books came out.' 

horsemouth has been watching the first series of fallout (he should confess to this). 

candlemass day (the soul bell)

'soon after 9 o'clock the soul bell toiled suddenly. I felt it must be poor mrs. jones of pencommon... I sent hannah out and she brought confirmation of my suspicions.' 

- kilvert, diaries, candlemass day (2nd february) 1872.

'may there be peace and love and perfection throughout all creation, oh god...' (repeated three times) 

- john coltrane and pharoah sanders probably recorded this day 1966.

for kilvert the weather is unseasonably good.

'the morning was superb, warm and brilliant like a may morning, and the hundreds of yellow stars of the cape jessamine between the drawing room and dining room windows were full of bees.' 

today is typically groundhog day with all sorts of bears, badgers and groundhogs taken as prognosticators of the remaining length of winter.  

horsemouth has taken up reading marguerite duras's practicalities again.

'this book helped us pass the time. from the beginning of autumn to the end of winter...' 

it's a book of the year. a book of half the year. memories from the summer and from long ago intrude, but it's a book of winter tales. some passages are read raw and no longer hold his interest. others horsemouth discovers again afresh. 

three houses (back and fore). 

the smell of chemicals/ the ladies of the black rocks (trouville). 'where I live now.'

alcohol/ house and home (neauphle)

the round stones/ the people of the night/ the vasty deep (paris)

horsemouth finds duras' novels/ her plays/ her filmwork less interesting than her writing and journaling. the novels that pretend to be autobiographical he likes more (the lover). the wartime writings more interesting still (but he doesn't know what has happened to his copy). summer 1980 (the journal) he thinks he would find interesting but only a few entries from it are translated (and these he does not have). 

 

IMBOLC (pinch punch first of the month/ horsemouth the bicameral)

horsemouth has been reading alberto manguel's a history of reading and we are with saints augustine and ambrose in milan and with reading outloud and reading silently. 

in the book there is much theorising of reading comprehension based on notions of the lateralization of brain function (that the mind is divided into two hemispheres and processing of various stimuli tends to take place more on one side or on the other).

horsemouth has just realised that his current plans will have to survive a friday the 13th.

reading out loud/ reading silently

horsemouth you may know of from such roles as paul the smart and kind. it may surprise you to learn that he has also played other roles in his life (most notably paul the stupid and cruel). horsemouth has been bothered by some remorse over the actions of paul the stupid and cruel recently but there's not much he can do about it now (it's all done and dusted as it were). 

nonetheless it turns round and gets him sometimes. this probably indicates that he is doing too little. he was troubled less by all this remorse when he was beset on all sides by importuning ghosts and decisions at the communal endeavour. 

so here is howard and a tiger print from india (it's a bit kenneth anger don't you think)

as horsemouth remarked to howard (during a recent zoom beers session) he is happiest when he is busy (but not so busy that he is being worked to death like howard is you understand). howard finishes work on friday 13th february and then has half term off until monday the 23rd. 

this should work well(ish) with horsemouth's 17th to 27 itinerary. ideally horsemouth would get in to town sooner (but that may not be possible). 

here a rainy and grey morning. horsemouth was out to the chickens at about 8am. currently he's listening to a morning raga  by ravi shankar. 

books, films, gigs, events january 2026

 horsemouth had to catch himself that it was no longer 2025

books

- the usual diaries and journals (kilvert, goethe italian journey  etc.)

- daniel heller-roazen echolalias: on the forgetting of language and review by carlett spike of heller-roazen's new book far calls 

- alberto manguel a history of reading

-  wikipedia mail art entry, thule airforce base crash 1968, greenland entry, robert jenrick, margaret fuller

- GDN reports on fuel poverty etc.

- yunna moritz's the great russian readership: where has it gone? in leopard II

- nan goldin, the ballad of sexual dependency, new introduction, march 1996 (on diaries)

- m. john harrison viriconium

- sleevenotes to keith jarrett album spirits 

- george orwell on working in a bookshop

- two stories from the j.g. ballard short story collection the day of forever

- glyn hughes millstone grit

- TLS why stylish stationary won't change your life

- LRB on greenland, 

- buck curran interview

films

- jonas mekas's hare krishna

- episode 1 spanish tv series about palomares B52 crash

- winter solstice 1 buck curran 

-  an interview with robbie basho from the night before the bohn gig 1980 on the british forces broadcast service ) 

- william holt  in a film by sam hanna

-  two discussion of municipal art: concrete sculptures from manchester (william george mitchell) and ceramic panels from rochdale (george and joan stephenson)

- documentary on the joys of the 7" single (the 45) 

- the walls of malapaga 

- new statesman student debt crisis

- corridos tumbados

- bookpilled, outlaw bookseller

- LRB on venezuela, when will the AI bubble burst

- FT 'graduate jobpocalypse', new statesman on graduate debt, FT energy transition

gigs no gigs (except for wave debb)

events

storm chandra.

mail art - imperfect pyramids by rob lawson, dan greene and dr. space arrives, arrival of triple negative calendar.

government warm homes plan announced, people wargame what happens if trump refuses to go.

deaths of ralph towner, andrew bodnar (of the rumour, of graham parker and...) 

last day of january/ imbolc eve

yesterday horsemouth struggled with international do nothing day (ok international do nothing day against ICE). in truth he has done exactly the same amount of dicking around online that he would normally do - he just hasn't told you about it. maybe he needs to up it to an actual digital holiday day. he has tried not to like anything nor to copy down its link and pass it on. this is all a bit strange. 

 today/ last day of january/ imbolc eve

horsemouth has typed this in unsure if he will in fact in the end use it. 

here it is rainy once again

here it is rainy once again. pretty much rainy all weekend and pretty much rainy all week. maybe some sleet and snow the week after (or maybe that's an artefact of the seasonal averages). 

except this morning it is dry (perhaps temporarily). the sun rolls up the hills at the end of the valley. horsemouth is back from chicken feeding.

gwenifer raymond interview 

a good one. the source of it all the pre-war blues, confirmation found in fahey, a cassette gets sent to WMFU and passed on to tompkins square, fingerpicks for speed/ martin strings. 

today (again). possible zoom beers with howard. maybe a walk up the hill. maybe a cleaning out of the chicken shed.