horsemouth getting ahead of himself and counting his blessings

 it is late in the evening. horsemouth is starting this blog early (is it because he feels grumpy?). 

horsemouth read a little of anne truitt's diaries online. in particular yield the one she was writing in her 80ies. (it follows on from hs reading a bookforum article about her). success (as an artist) didn't come until her forties and then she moved to japan following her husband's diplomatic work. her diarising came later (journaling seems to be the preferred term at the minute). 

'truitt would record herself reading her handwritten journals aloud, revising as she spoke. this preliminary manuscript would then be further edited, first by truitt, then her editor. their reasoned, steady tone is in keeping with this process...'

the bookforum article makes something of her allowing the diaries of her murdered friend mary pinchot meyer to pass to the CIA when mary had wanted anne herself to secure them. earlier her friend had had an affair with john f. kennedy. 

it's later and horsemouth is reading rousseau's walk number one - except he doesn't seem to go anywhere he's just ruminating on his position in society, complaining about his lot. horsemouth sympathises (quite a bit actually). rousseau claims not to care any more. he does however take great care to avoid 'society'. he has his health. he has a flat where he and his wife live. they have work enough to feed them. he has time enough to go walking and to think and to revisit his interest in botany. so fuck all the haters  really. 

the book will be constructed from these writings after his death. most of the pieces are already polished (as if rousseau knew that they would be published). 

after lovecraft died (if indeed he did, if his spirit did not in fact just move to another vessel) it was his circle of friends (mostly like minded jobbing authors) who kept his work in print. they did this through arkham house publishers or by using the cthuhlu mythos for themselves,. keeping it alive for the generation it took for his work to find favour. 

horsemouth has few real problems. he has enough to live on (maybe - so it seems). the room is very comfortable. the things that give him anxiety or enrage him are the things he involves himself in by choice (mostly). he could always give them up or move away from them. he could, for example, just take more holidays. 

here we see him counting his blessings just in case any have gone missing. 

yesterday (by the time you read this) a pleasant walk with TG. in the afternoon some reading, some listening to the news and watching documentaries. horsemouth found the popul vuh soundtracked movie Sei Still, Wisse ICH BIN. 

doubtless more will occur to him in the morning. 

more has occurred. he has done a little re-editing of the above text and made a change of title. for horsemouth the more measured voice and sense of self that comes out of doing this is one of the benefits of blogging. 

horsemouth dreamt (but they are now refusing to come when recalled). outside it is grey and there is evidence that it has rained. horsemouth is nearly at the end of his coffee. the usual suspects prowl around the neighbourhood - walking their dogs, taking the kids to school, going to work.